Sure, I know all about gay guys having sex with straight guys, but it felt reassuring to see him describe the “saint and sinner role” he embodied during those experiences, and to hear the uncertainty and melancholy weaved into the song. It was listening to Years & Years’ new song “Sanctify,” and seeing the band’s out gay singer Olly Alexander talk about how the song was inspired his sexual trysts with straight men, that I realized that these feelings are way more common than people let on. Worst of all, though, the shame attached to the memories of those first times marred how I would approach sex for years. I realize I fell into that old gay adage of placing my feelings on a person who, for whatever reason, was never going to invest them back in me. I believe it was just sex, or at least that’s what I have tell myself now to avoid slipping into a memory induced k-hole. I think, when I look back now and occasionally find myself tumbling through his Facebook page, that he wasn’t. I never learned whether the boy I lost my virginity to was struggling with his sexuality. I’m not sure whether I really fell for the guy or not, but I do know that at the end of it he was just using me to get off. And while at the beginning I felt like I had the upper hand in the situation-I was the one who was out and comfortable in my sexuality, right?-after each time we met became more secretive and more dirty, I began to feel secretive, dirty, and most of all shameful. We’d meet surreptitiously in dark and make out in the cold British weather on a park bench before venturing back to his place to have sex. I didn’t tell him that I’d never had sex with someone before instead, saturated with vodka and inflated by nerves, I was swept up in the motions.įor the next year, we’d hook-up on and off, usually at 3 a.m. All I know is that one moment we were talking and the next minute, well. The minutiae of exactly how things developed from us being together in that room to us having slightly unsuccessful sex in a bathroom in a different corridor have since escaped me. He was clearly intoxicated, but it was a party after all and who was I, quite drunk myself, to judge. It was late (or early, depending on your outlook on the world) when I was joined by the boy who was living in the room next to mine, way back on the other side of the building.
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I can remember, although I'd had some drinks, sitting alone in my friend’s room on a single bed, the mattress overly springy and with a coarse plastic coating, attempting to stream a song over our dorm’s spotty Internet connection. The whole thing went down near the end of my freshman year at a party, at which people from the whole dorm floor were drunk and celebrating, carelessly streaming in and out of each other’s rooms, following the various different pop songs until one room took their fancy. I was at college, living in dorms, and the experience-aside from the usual horrifying awkwardness and somewhat spontaneity of the occasion-was completely and utterly unremarkable aside from one thing: the guy I slept with identified as straight. xXx sets out to entertain, and that it does.I was 19 when I first had full-on sex with another man.
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No one would believe a guy like Xander Cage would be recruited as an undercover agent in any sort of organization, but that's not really the point.
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I think the bottom line is, this movie is so far-fetched and insane that it works as one of the best mindless action adventures of the last decade. Jackson & an equally clichéd turn from Marton Csokas. The supporting characters are fittingly absurd and bizzare, led by a prototypical performance from Samuel L. All are staples of the franchise, and Xander Cage's first film outing is no different. Fast cars, explosions, women in scantily clad attire, incoherent plots, over-the-top villains, and catchy music.
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Essentially, this is just another Fast & Furious movie. Especially when it contains countless one-liners that do nothing but put a smile on my face from ear to ear. Or, at least the dialogue coming out of their mouths is awful.īut does a film like this really need to have great dialogue? I guess not.
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The humor is there, but in no way do I believe it's intentionally funny. xXx certainly has fun action, but that's about it. Now, the Fast & Furious franchise has figured out the right balance of lighthearted humor, bada** action sequences, and developed characters who we actually care about. What's not to like about it? Heck, even the horribly awful things are entertaining.īack when Vin Diesel decided not to come back to the Fast & Furious franchise, he chose to join F&F 1 director Rob Cohen in taking on another ridiculous action extravaganza, xXx. If any future filmmakers are looking for inspiration in the guilty-pleasure high octane action genre, xXx is exactly the film to look into.